Apr 3, 2012
When the going gets tough. PT 1.
There are times in a relationship when it feels like more work then fun. When that time comes you may be tempted to flee, be hostile or isolate yourself. If you are in a committed relationship you know how harmful that can be to your relationship. I am going to do a series on getting through the tough times in a relationship. Hoping to help anyone that is going through this and also as therapy for myself.
How do you deal with animosity in your relationship?
Do you get irritable and snap at your mate? Do you act like everything is OK, when they're not? Do you find ways to stay apart more? Whatever your coping mechanism is you really need to be genuine with yourself and your situation.
For instance I know I cope with relationship problems internally. I hold it in until I burst or I'm coaxed to purge. I know... not healthy at all. However, I grew up in a strict single parent home, Mom was too busy trying to survive to listen. Expressing yourself out of adversity as a child was a bit unheard of. You're a kid, you're not supposed to have worries....Wrong! I keep this burden of silence with me to this day when I feel completely overwhelmed with emotions. Knowing your coping mechanism helps you figure out if you may have some issues that you need to address.
I would encourage you to take the time out to recognize you're coping mechanism. Once you do try to pinpoint exactly why you cope like you do. If you cope an unhealthy way then you may need to try to correct it or at least acknowledge your issue.
Next Tuesday let's discuss the 2nd point...Honesty in your situation.