When the going gets tough Pt.2

There are times in a relationship when it feels like more work then fun.  When that time comes you may be tempted to flee,  be hostile or isolate yourself.  If you are in a committed relationship you know how harmful that can be to your relationship.  In the first part of this series we talked about finding your coping mechanism and why you cope the way you do.  Hoping to help anyone that is going through this and also as therapy for myself. To see Part one here is the link.This is the second part of the "When the Going Gets Tough".

Being honest with your situation means making a commitment to work on your relationship when it gets tough, or coming to the realization that the relationship isn't what you both want. Your relationship has to be a commitment that you're willing to give the amount of effort it takes to see it through the tough times.

You must get to the root of the problem.  Are you depressed? Are you taking things out on him when it has nothing to do with him? It is impossible to be in a happy relationship if you aren't happy with yourself.  The next step is to evaluate how you feel about your relationship within yourself.  Likewise your mate.  If one of you is feeling incomplete there is no way one can give themselves to another completely.

If one or both of you aren't happy within yourselves then you may need a break from each other so that you can solely focus on yourself.  For example when I took a break I stayed at my house everyday instead of spending the night with him. That gave me time to establish my own identity again even though we still saw each other for a couple of hours everyday. We looked forward to the hours we would spend together again.  I took on projects that gave me confidence and that made me happy. Even if you live with each other try to do things that you like to do away from the house. Try to spend time with friends or family members.  A little space can do wonders for a relationship that's going through a rough patch. It actually gives you time to appreciate each other and get to the bottom of why you're relationship is going through the ringer.